ItsOKtoExplode

My Top Albums of 2011

2011-12-21T20:50:00.003-05:00

My Favorite Albums of 2011

1. Kurt Vile - Smoke Ring For My Halo

2. Fucked Up - David Comes to Life

3. Bon Iver - Bon Iver

4. The War On Drugs - Slave Ambient

5. Yuck - Yuck

6. Male Bonding - Endless Now

7. The Pains of Being Pure at Heart - Belong

8. The Joy Formidable - The Big Roar

9. Adele - 21

10. Stephen Malkmus & The Jicks - Mirror Traffic

11. Frank Turner - England Keep My Bones

12. Pure X - Pleasure

13. Cymbals Eat Guitars - Lenses Alien

14. Real Estate - Days

15. Wild Flag - Wild Flag

16. Washed Out - Within and Without

17. The Vaccines - What Did You Expect From The Vaccines?

18. Black Lips - Arabia Mountain

19. M83 - Hurry Up, We're Dreaming

20. BOAT - Dress Like Your Idols

21. Dum Dum Girls - Only In Dreams

22. Los Campesinos! - Hello Sadness

23. TV On The Radio - Nine Types of Light

24. Florence + the Machine - Ceremonials

25. The Weeknd - House of Balloons

26. Future Islands - On the Water

27. Jeff the Brotherhood - We Are The Champions

28. Handsome Furs - Sound Kapital

29. The Horrible Crowes - Elsie

30. The Rapture - In the Grace of Your Love

31. The Twerps - s/t

32. Youth Lagoon - The Year of Hibernation

33. My Morning Jacket - Circuital

34. Black Keys - El Camino

35. Foster the People - Torches

36. Sleeper Agent - Celabrasion

37. The Antlers - Burst Apart

38. Cults - Cults

39. Arctic Monkeys - Suck It And See

40. Mogwai - Hardcore Will Never Die, But You Will

41. Givers - In Light

42. The Throne - Watch the Throne

43. St. Vincent - Strange Mercy

44. Active Child - You Are All I See

45. Wilco - The Whole Love

46. Girls - Father, Son, Holy Ghost

47. Telekinesis - 12 Desperate Straight Lines

48. Deer Tick - Divine Providence

49. Coldplay - Mylo Xyloto

50. Neon Indian - Era Extraña

EPs of Note

Wavves - Life Sux

Surfer Blood - Tarot Classics

DOM - Family of Love

Jens Lekman - An Argument With Myself

Dum Dum Girls - He Gets Me High

Most Overrated

Radiohead – The King of Limbs

Fleet Foxes – Helplessness Blues

James Blake – James Blake

Biggest Disappointments

Radiohead – The King of Limbs

Bright Eyes - The People’s Key

Fleet Foxes – Helplessness Blues

Most Underrated

Male Bonding - Endless Now

Frank Turner - England Keep My Bones

BOAT - Dress Like Your Idols

Worst Thing I Heard

Lou Reed & Metallica – Lulu

Honorable Mention

I was unable to objectively rank this album since my friends are in the band, but I highly suggest checking out Sainthood Reps’ “Monoculture”!

Radiohead - Lotus Flower

2011-02-18T13:06:00.003-05:00

My Top Albums of 2010

2010-12-23T15:10:00.005-05:00

My Favorite Albums
1. Surfer Blood - Astro Coast
2. The Gaslight Anthem - American Slang
3. LCD Soundsystem - This Is Happening
4. Arcade Fire - The Suburbs
5. Superchunk - Majesty Shredding
6. Broken Social Scene - Forgiveness Rock Record
7. Wavves - King of the Beach
8. Vampire Weekend - Contra
9. Radio Dept. - Clinging to a Scheme
10. Deerhunter - Halcyon Digest
11. Robyn - Body Talk
12. Les Savy Fav - Roots of Ruin
13. Best Coast - Crazy For You
14. Wild Nothing - Gemini
15. Ted Leo - The Brutalist Bricks
16. The Soft Pack - s/t
17. Yeasayer - Odd Blood
18. Tokyo Police Club - Champ
19. Los Campesinos! - Romance Is Boring
20. Jaill - That's How We Burn
21. Belle and Sebastian - Write About Love
22. Frightened Rabbit - Winter of Mixed Drinks
23. Poison Control Center - Sad Sour Future
24. Local Natives - Gorilla Manor
25. Gorillaz - Plastic Beach
26. The Drums - s/t
27. The New Pornographers - Together
28. Spoon - Transference
29. The Hold Steady - Heaven Is Whenever
30. Shout Out Louds - Work
31. DOM - Sun Bronzed Greek Gods [EP]
32. Sun Airway - Nocturne of Exploded Crystal Chandelier
33. Against Me! - White Crosses
34. The Thermals - Personal Life
35. Violens - Amoral
36. The National - High Violet
37. Male Bonding - Nothing Hurts
38. Band of Horses - Infinite Arms
39. The Love Language - Libraries
40. Broken Bells - s/t

Most Overrated Albums
Sleigh Bells - Treats
Kanye West - My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy
MGMT - Congratulations

Biggest Disappointments
MGMT - Congratulations
Interpol - s/t
Ra Ra Riot - The Orchard

Most Underrated Albums
Surfer Blood - Astro Coast
Superchunk - Majesty Shredding
Radio Dept. - Clinging to a Scheme

SantaBOT

2010-12-10T13:57:00.001-05:00

me: i want death

SantaClaus: I've got a billion children to keep track of -- so could you ask me something a bit more manageable? I'd very much appreciate it.

me: i want katy perry

SantaClaus: My goodness! You certainly are direct!

me: i want a puppy

SantaClaus: Wonderful! Now we are getting somewhere.

me: i want a puppy with wings

SantaClaus: Ho! Ho! Wonderful.

me: and i want his tail to be a machine gun

SantaClaus: Oh, Ho Ho! O:-) Now let's get serious! Anything else?

me: tell santa i want a kitten

and a robot

SantaClaus: I suspect that's not all!

me: you're right. i want to fly

SantaClaus: What would your last Christmas wish be?

me: i want an empty box of hate

SantaClaus: O.K. that's quite a list! Why don't you type, poll and vote for your favorite holiday album?

me: why don't you suck an egg(nog)

SantaClaus: Santa loves eggnog!

me: damn right he does

SantaClaus: Hmm. I'm afraid that kind of language won't get you into the nice column with me.
That's a lump of coal for you.

me: oh, no! not coal!

SantaClaus: O.K. then. Well, have a merry Christmas in any case.

me: you too, good lookin'

SantaClaus: That's a good question, Santa is no hypocrite: I've been on my best behavior, all year.

me: what? are you drunk?

SantaClaus: Oh dear, I am Father Christmas. You really don't remember me?

me: you used to touch me

Playground Law

2010-12-10T09:01:00.002-05:00

There is absolutely no logic behind "Whoever smelt it, dealt it." None. It has always bothered me.

Robyn Good

2010-11-23T21:31:00.001-05:00

Guilty pleasure...

Robyn - Hang With Me [official video]

Watch "Money Hunters"!

2010-04-30T00:15:00.005-04:00

[self-promotion alert]

This Saturday, May 1, the Do-It-Yourself network will be premiering a brand new series called "Money Hunters", produced by my company, Nancy Glass Productions. It stars licensed contractor Matt Blashaw, and engineer extraordinaire Deanne Bell. They'll show you how to renovate on a budget using alternative materials and products, giving tips and using gadgets along the way. Take notes.

Our pilot episode will be airing at 8pm, and my producing (solo) debut will air at 8:30pm. Set your DVRs and tell momma!

Yes, Master

2010-04-11T17:56:00.003-04:00

what i learned from watching the masters:
- anthony kim has the best worst belt buckle ever.
- the bunkers are filled with crushed marble.
- the commentators think it's possible for one to have the shot of their career, yet that same shot is not their best shot of the tournament.

Best. Anything. Ever.

2010-04-09T13:48:00.004-04:00

This video cannot be topped lyrically, nor visually. It's educational, entertaining, and inspiring all at once.

Best 2 lines:

"Water, fire, air, and dirt /
Fucking magnets, how do they work?"

"I fed a fish to a pelican at Frisco Bay /
It tried to eat my cell phone, he ran away."

Pure. Mother Fucking. Magic.

iChrist

2010-04-08T12:19:00.003-04:00

The 4th generation operating system for the iPhone was announced today. Does anyone else see a Christian cross and shadow? Talk about a God complex...

Tend To Be

2010-03-26T23:54:00.003-04:00

Gillians tend to be brunette, motherly, and surprisingly into athletics.
Jillians tend to be blond, with a youthful energy.

Sarahs tend to be bookish, yet very sexual.
Sara's tend to be spunky and might punch you solidly when horsing around.

Kenny Kohle

2010-03-19T17:43:00.007-04:00

Have you ever had your dreams come true one second, and then your heartbroken the next?

It happened to me yesterday as I perused the correspondence section of RollingStone Issue #1101. There it was: I had a letter published in the magazine I grew up on! ... and they misspelled my name!

And the real kick in the penis is that they e-mailed me a few weeks ago to confirm the correct spelling of my name. Tragic.

Still, I'm pretty happy, especially since my letter contained references to LOST and The Jersey Shore.

I have a remedy though: I will be taking the necessary steps to legally change my name to "Kenny Kohle" (I envision it being pronounced like "Coal", but some of my co-workers imagine it to be "Colé" ... that might be too exotic for a German / Irish boy like me).

Philly Craft Beer Festival

2010-03-06T20:40:00.001-05:00

I attended the Philly Craft Beer Festival (my first beer festival) on Saturday and it was, I have to say, pretty remarkable. What's also remarkable is that I kept myself intact. Here's what went down (literally):

Note: an "*" denotes a brew I recall especially liking...

Stone Brewing Company - Stone Smoked Porter
Thomas Hooker - Watermelon Ale
Coronado Brewing Company - Mermaids Red Ale *
Brew Dog Beer - Dogma Heather Honey Infused Ale
Boulder Beer - Planet Porter
Hometown Beverages - Pennsylvania Lager
Manayunk Brewery - California Dreamin'
Caldera Brewing Company - Ashland Amber *
Magic Hat Brewing Company - Vinyl Lager *
Troegs Brewing Company - Pale Ale
Doc's Draft Hard Cider - Hard Apple Cider
Doc's Draft Hard Cider - Hard Pear Cider *
Ballast Point - Calico Amber Ale
Sixpoint Craft Ales - Mason Black Wheat
The Bruery - Orchard White *
Beer Valley Brewing Company - Black Flag American Style Imperial Stout
Atomium Beer - Het A Hernitef Hik Brune *
Blue Point Brewing Company - Rastafar Rye Ale *
River Horse Brewing Company - Brewer's Reserve Double White Belgian Style Ale *
Voodoo Brewery - Pilzilla
Original Sin Hard Cider - Pear Cider
Lakefront Brewery - Fuel Cafe
Cigar City Brewing - Jai Alai India Pale Ale *
Intercourse Brewing Company - Bareville Pilsner
Roy Pitz Brewing Company - Best Blonde Ale *
Dark Horse Brewing Company - One Oatmeal Stout

Afterwards we ventured out for some additional food and drinks so while I'm "link-happy" I'd like to shout out the Lucky 13 Pub for their awesome juke box, delicious food, and hospitable owner, Clark.

Cantina Los Caballitos was quite amazing as well, although by that point my eyes were bigger than my stomach. I'll be enjoying my pork and chicken taco leftovers tonight.

Surfer Blood

2010-03-02T09:52:00.003-05:00

Surfer Blood at the Barbary was awesome! For such a hyped band it was cool to see they were having fun on stage and not worried about playing perfectly. Here are 2 videos I shot last night:

"Swim", their "single":

"Anchorage", my personal favorite:

Down With the Update

2010-02-27T14:46:00.000-05:00

Absurdly, I haven't updated my 101 in 1001 since July 13th. Here's the rundown:

2] Run 3 Marathons - I completed the Philly Marathon on 11.02.09. It was my second marathon overall, and my first towards completing three for my 101. I bettered my time from the previous year by almost 30 minutes, and my knee held up the entire time.
25] Paint a Room for Someone - In August we went over Brian & Dawn's new house for their Painting Party. Barb and I tackled the bedroom.
31 / 32] Do something charitable every Thanksgiving / Christmas - I totally dropped the ball on this and didn't do anything significantly charitable for the holidays. However, I allowed myself to make up for it by donating money to Haiti via the Red Cross.

41] Donate 100,000 Grains of Rice on freerice.com - Currently up to 30,200 grains of rice.

43] Donate a garbage bag filled w/ old clothes - Check. I can't believe some of the clothes I at one time liked and/or fit in.

49] Figure out my credit score - Check. Satisfied.

50] Save up for and buy an Apple computer - This one is tricky. I did save up enough to buy one, but then we were dumb-struck when we received one as a gift. I'm counting it as done.

54] Cook 50 Different Recipes - Done!
- Lime Basil Cous-Cous
- Moroccan Chicken Kebabs
- Grilled Pork Tenderloin à la Rodriguez with Apricot Glaze and Orange Jalapeno
- Burger with Red Bell Pepper and Feta Spread
- Chicken with Grilled Onions and Plums
- Greek Roast Chicken
- Southwestern Salmon
- Beet, Goat Cheese, & Arugula Salad
- Emeril's Oven Roasted Pork Tenderloin
- Corbi-Fein Brussel Sprouts
- Bacon Herb Wrapped Pork Tenderloin
- Broccoli with Sun-Dried Tomatoes and Parmesan
- Lemon Glazed Sweet Potatoes
- Maple Glazed Spiced Carrots
- Weight Watchers Cheeseburger with Grilled Onions
- Beef and Vegetable Cheese Casserole
- Balsamic Chicken with Mushrooms
- Lemon Grass Chicken and Noodles
- Spaghetti with Turkey Meatballs
- Stuffed Portobello Mushrooms
- Open-Faced Tuna and Artichoke Melt

55] Drink at 5 Different Breweries - 2 new ones, 4 out 5 done total.
- Dogfish Head. Amazing. The vintage 120 Minute IPA was memorable for sure.
- Pocono Brewing Company. It was OK. The brews helped nurse my newly fractured distal radius.

57] Maintain an herb garden for an entire summer - Done. It helped that I was pretty much laid off for the entire summer. It was nice to have so many herbs at my disposal. It definitely helped out grilling meat and amping up my omlettes.

58] Enjoy a glass of real spiked egg-nog (bonus: next to a fire!) - Done and bonus achieved with some local Pennsylvania Dutch egg-nog.

63] Learn the basics of a popular editing program - In September I was responsible for cutting together some casting videos and had a crash course using the Avid. I am no maestro, but I no virgin either.

65] Learn 5 "popular" (read: recognizable) songs on the guitar - 2 new ones, 4 out 5 done total.
- R.E.M. - "Man On the Moon"
- The Wallflowers - "Three Marlenas"

69] Attend 25 concerts / shows - I've missed out on a lot of good shows that have come through town but I did see a few. The count is now at 11 out of 25.
- Sunny Day Real Estate at the Trocadero
- Brand New at the Electric Factory
- Sainthood Reps at the North Star Bar
- Brian Fallon, lead singer of the Gaslight Anthem (acoustic show) - First Unitarian Church

72] Geek-out on iTunes #2: Give star-ratings to all of my unrated songs in iTunes - I have a few unrated right now, but at one point everything was rated. All 20,000+ songs, aka approximately 55 days worth of music. Booyah.

73] Compile a playlist of my favorite song each week for a year (each selected song must be new to me that week) - This was completed, and has since been dubbed "A Year In the Ear". If anyone's interested I'll send you a copy. Let me know. Additions since the last update:
- Crocodiles - I Wanna Kill
- Dinosaur Jr. - See You
- The Exploding Hearts - Modern Kicks
- The Rural Alberta Advantage - Edmonton
- The Big Pink - Dominos
- The Knife - Heartbeats
- Arctic Monkeys - Cornerstone
- Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds - More News From Nowhere
- Hot Chip - Ready for the Floor
- Julian Plenti - Only If You Run
- Brand New - At the Bottom
- Girls - Lust For Life
- The Drums - Let's Go Surfing
- Comet Gain - Brothers Off the Block
- The Feelies - The High Road
- The xx - VCR
- Woods - Rain On
- Julian Casablancas - 11th Dimension
- The Raveonettes - Gone Forever
- Best Coast - When I'm With You

78] Read 30 books by 30 different authors - I've had a major slow down with this one, but a few updates. Currently at 18 of 30.

- About.com Guide to Web Design - Jennifer Kyrnin
- Learning Web Design - Jennifer Niederst Robbins
- 33 1/3: Gentlemen - Bob Gendron
- 33 1/3: Murmur - J. Niimi
- Open - Andre Agassi <-- highly entertaining

86] Visit the West Coast - Unexpectedly done. It was a very last-minute thing, but I was sent to LA for work. Luckily it wasn't all business. I got to see my good friend and old college roommate, AJ, as well as experiencing a culinary tour de force thanks to Gerry and Carla. Check out the LA run down in this older post.

94] Photograph 5 sunrises in 5 different places - 2 of 5. An early call time on set out in LA generated this shot:
95] Photograph 5 sunsets in 5 different places - 3 of 5. AJ took me down to Venice Beach and I happened to catch this shot:
99] Visit 10 new places in our Philly guide book - 5 and 6 out of 10. I'd really like to concentrate on this more. F'real.

- The Ritz-Calton / 10 Arts by Eric Ripert. We ate at the restaurant, we didn't stay at the hotel. We went because we're huge fans of Top Chef and this is where Jennifer from the latest season works. We went while the show was towards the end of the season, before Jennifer was kicked off, and we didn't know if she'd be there or not. Barb can tell you she was, because as soon as I left to use the bathroom she walked out of the kitchen with her trademarked scowl.

- North Star - We got to see our friends Derrick and Cesco's new band, Sainthood Reps, here over the holidays. Check out their music!
This is long. I bet you didn't read all of this. Did you?

Los Angeles

2010-02-20T15:30:00.009-05:00

At the end of January I was lucky enough to take a last minute business trip to LA. It was my first business trip and it was frustrating to not be able to handle it like a vacation. Normally I would have the entire trip planned and spend every wakened hour out and about exploring. Instead, I spent most of my time on set dealing with landscapers and setting up time-lapses. I can't complain though because I got to experience a plethora of amazing food and shared a baggage carousel with Andy Dick. When all is said and done, let it be known: LA is a ridiculously good food town.

Here's a list of where I got to eat, loosely ranked from my favorite to my least favorite:

- City Sip (great wine deals, great cheeses, stoned waitstaff)
- Kogi (Mexican style Korean BBQ served out of a truck whose location you follow on Twitter)
- The Kitchen (I'm embarrassed to boast about how ridiculous their turkey burger is)
- Soy Cafe (1st pho experience)
- Wurstkuche (snake sausage, truffle oil fries with curry ketchup)
- Malo ($1 taco night!)
- Bacon-wrapped Hot Dog outside of the Drawing Room (a dive bar frequented by Kiefer Sutherland)
- Lemongrass (really good appetizers, but I ordered off of the Specials and it was a tad under-seasoned)
- Vinoteca Farfalla (again, really good appetizers, but my short rib was not spicy like advertised, although it was remarkably tender)
- In-N-Out Burger (Animal Style. NBD)
- The Oinkster (I regretfully ate healthy here, but the goat cheese crouton was cool. Their pastrami looked nuts.)

... and this doesn't include all of the authentic Mexican places we ordered from on set. One word: "sopa".

And watering holes:

- The Dresden (yes, the 2 singers were there)
- Silverlake Wine ($4 wine tasting + free cheese. Somehow Carla noticed some New Melrose Place cast members. And I thought no one watched that...)
- The York (food looked/smelled really good, but only got drinks. Cool interior, nice local beers.)
- 4100 (darkest. bar. ever... good juke box)
- Formosa Cafe (I think this place is "known". Not sure.)
- Good (was OK. Large beer list, but nothing too crazy. Waiter was weird. And there's no bar, only tables)

"If patience started a band / I'd be her biggest fan" - Elliott Smith

Giving Up the Gun

2010-02-19T12:58:00.004-05:00

Although I find the new Vampire Weekend album, Contra, to be somewhat lackluster their video for "Giving Up the Gun" is anything but. I'm a sucker for tennis, but throwing in the following motley crew really seals the deal:

RZA, chair umpire
Jake Gyllenhaal, drunk tennis player
Lil Jon, French speaking coach
Joe Jonas, uncoordinated tennis player

http://video.aol.com/aolvideo/AOL Music/giving-up-the-gun/67301247001

Ashes to Ashes

2010-02-19T11:38:00.004-05:00

I love Ash Wednesday because it never fails to deliver a "What the fuck?!" moment. I undoubtedly forget that it is, indeed, Ash Wednesday. I'm going about my day like any other day and then - BOOM! - it hits me. I spy with my naked eye a person with a black smudge on their forehead and my mind instantaneously goes: "What the fuck?!" Then it all makes sense. Ah, Ash Wednesday, you son of a bitch. You got me again, you...

Crisp!

2010-02-12T11:48:00.002-05:00

Kashi's new GoLean Crisp!: Toasted Berry Crumble is excellent. It has a different "mouth feel" than other Kashi products. It’s almost grainy, but in a good way. It's very similar to Bear Naked plain granola in texture. I like when the pieces cluster together and give a satisfying crunch. Oh, and the berries are chewy, which is nice compared to a Special K berry that is dehydrated. I would pay up to $3 per box.

Damn the 24hr News Cycle

2010-01-20T17:02:00.002-05:00

What's with CNN and their weird obsession with annoying hip-hop personalities? It all started with the hologram will.i.am on election night! This is what I just witnessed on CNN:

“Wyclef Jean just sent this Tweet and I want to share it with you: ‘buildings falling N da Capital of haiti, but n order 2 clean up da capital we need a massive Exodus.’ He says the buildings are falling. He says they need everybody to leave. He says, ‘I am calling on da US Army.’ That’s Wyclef Jean making that statement a little while ago. He Tweeted that and we wanted to share that with you. We think it’s relevant, we think it’s important, we think it’s news worthy.” – CNN’s Rick Sanchez.

Naturally, this was followed up with CNN’s “Most Intriguing Person of the Day” segment. Of course it was Larry Platt, the mastermind behind the viral “Pants on the Ground.”

Death Cab for John Hughes

2010-01-18T20:16:00.003-05:00

VH1 TV Shows | Music Videos | Celebrity Photos | News & Gossip

My Top Albums of 2009

2009-12-19T18:29:00.003-05:00

Top 40 Albums of 2009
1. Yeah Yeah Yeahs - It's Blitz!
2. Brand New - Daisy
3. Passion Pit - Manners
4. Girls - Album
5. Tegan & Sara - Sainthood
6. Phoenix - Phoenix Wolfgang Amadeus
7. The xx - xx
8. Pains of Being Pure at Heart - Pains of Being Pure at Heart
9. Cut Off Your Hands - You & I
10. And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead - The Century of Self
11. Dinosaur Jr. - Farm
12. Raveonettes - In and Out of Control
13. Arctic Monkeys - Humbug
14. The Big Pink - A Brief History of Love
15. Morrissey - Years of Refusal
16. Japandroids - Post-Nothing
17. Animal Collective - Merriweather Post Pavilion
18. Crocodiles - Summer of Hate
19. Yo La Tengo - Popular Songs
20. Conor Oberst and the Mystic Valley Band - Outer South
21. Memory Tapes - Seek Magic
22. The Soft Pack - The Muslims
23. Julian Plenti - Julian Plenti is... Skyscraper
24. The Dodos - Time to Die
25. Real Estate - Real Estate
26. Discovery - LP
27. Silversun Pickups - Swoon
28. Matt and Kim - Grand
29. Pearl Jam - Backspacer
30. Wilco - Wilco (The Album)
31. Camera Obscura - My Maudlin Career
32. Black Lips - 200 Million Thousand
33. Great Lake Swimmers - Lost Channels
34. Julian Casablancas - Phrazes for the Young
35. U2 - No Line on the Horizon
36. Jay-Z - The Blueprint 3
37. Why? - Eskimo Snow
38. Metric - Fantasies
39. Grizzly Bear - Veckatimest
40. Sonic Youth - The Eternal

Top 10 EPs of 2009
1. The Drums - Summertime!
2. Bon Iver - Blood Bank
3. Death Cab for Cutie - The Open Door
4. Superchunk - Leaves In the Gutter
5. Delorean - Ayrton Senna
6. Animal Collective - Fall Be Kind
7. Washed Out - Life of Leisure
8. Pains of Being Pure At Heart - Higher Than the Stars
9. Fight Like Apes - You Filled His Head with Fluffy Clouds and Jolly Ranchers, What Did You Think Was Going to Happen?
10. Deerhunter - Rainwater Cassette Exchange

Most Overrated Albums of 2009
Bat For Lashes - Two Suns
The Dirty Projectors - Bitte Orca
Cymbals Eat Guitars - Why There Are Mountains
Grizzly Bear - Veckatimest
St. Vincent - Actor

Biggest Personal Disappointments of 2009
Youth Group - The Night Is Ours
Peter Bjorn & John - Living Thing
John Vanderslice - Romanian Names
The Dead Weather - Horehound
Eminem - Relapse

Albums I Wish I Heard
Monsters of Folk - Monsters of Folk
Built to Spill - There Is No Enemy
The Flaming Lips - Embryonic
Atlas Sound - Logos
Neon Indian - Psychic Chasms

Camokini

2009-12-06T15:22:00.005-05:00

"The pervasiveness of camouflage - from fashion to war - attests to the troubled relationship with violence that seems to characterize modern times." - Thomas Hirschhorn

I Hate the Dentist

2009-10-26T12:35:00.002-04:00

Dentist: "What we're gonna do is cut away the gum with a little electricity."'

Me: "That sounds awfully horrific."

Dentist: "Well, Benjamin Franklin actually had an idea to use electricity to kill animals. He thought it would be more humane. OK. Ready to begin?"

Seattle Seahighlighters

2009-09-30T13:29:00.002-04:00

"Check out the new Seahawks jerseys. If you don't think they're awesome, you need awesome lessons."

- Neil Everett, SportsCenter

Adopting a Theory by Megan Fox

2009-09-28T11:14:00.001-04:00

This month's RollingStone features an in-depth interview with the adroit Megan Fox. She drops pearls of wisdom left and right, but the one I'll be taking to heart is her advice on how to avoid dieing in a plane crash:

"She happily elaborates on why she likes to listen to Britney Spears on her iPod while flying: 'Flying really freaks me out, but I know that it's not my destiny to die while listening to Britney.' "

So, next time I'm on a plane, I'll be sure to be pumping some Nickelback. Real loud.

Satan

2009-09-27T23:09:00.004-04:00

I went for a jog this evening and was pleased to come upon some sidewalk-chalk graffiti. Written in the middle of the street (in pink, mind you) was "I love Satan". Kids these days...

37 Years

2009-08-26T20:58:00.002-04:00

My parents have been married 37 years as of today. Not to sound cheesy, but hopefully I learned something from them.

I feel the need to recycle this excerpt from an old MySpace blog since MySpace is dead to me...

Quoting my Mom: "Marriage isn't about how many rooms of the house you can have sex in; it's about being there for the other person when they need you... it's having your husband hold a pillow against your boo boo."

As Andre 3000 would say, "Thank God for Mom and Dad, for sticking through together."

Location, Location, Location

2009-08-21T10:00:00.000-04:00

Barb and I want to move in the fall of 2010. We know what we want but we don't know where it exists. On our own, we both came up with a list of 10 requirements that our new location would ideally have. Do you know if this place exists? Help!

My Requirements (in no order):
- near the ocean (preferably with an irregular coastline)
- town has a "main street" (plenty of food options)
- within 1 hour of mountains/hiking
- no-snow winters
- major music scene within 1 hour
- close proximity to a major sports market
- affordable real estate for future house buying
- lots of outdoor activity options
- town is a little funky / has charm / history
- must photograph well

Barb's Requirements (in no order):
- walk-able "downtown"
- ocean or lake within 30 minutes
- MLB park doable in a day
- university / college to work at
- mild winters, low humidity
- young family vibe (not old or young high school / college vibe)
- potential to buy property before we're 30
- classy food scene
- free outdoor entertainment and fun (ex: beach movies)
- slower pace of life

Bellybutton Legs

2009-08-20T21:50:00.002-04:00

I had a dream a few nights ago and it's been freaking me out ever since. In my dream I had what I'll describe as "bellybutton legs".

I was sitting on a chair on a dock. Sticking out of my right thigh were 2 cardboard toilet paper tubes. They were about half-way in and my reasoning for having them was to hide my disfigured leg. I pulled them out and I had 2 "bellybuttons" on my right thigh ("innies", not "outies"). These were big bellybuttons though and whenever I picture them in my head my right leg tingles.

The Mirror Smearers

2009-08-02T20:04:00.007-04:00

Note to Self: Nobody cares about your Fantasy Football team as much as you do.

Now that that's out of the way, our draft was last night and, as always, it was a great time. I'm not overly thrilled with my team, but I think I could put together a good season and even surprise myself a little bit.

With no further a-do, ladies & gentlemen, I present to you... the 2009... Mirror Smearers!!!

QB - Matt Ryan - ATL
RB - Maurice Jones-Drew - JAC
RB - Kevin Smith - DET
WR - Anquan Boldin (Keeper) - ARI
WR - Roddy White - ATL
Flex - Pierre Thomas - NO
TE - Kevin Boss - NYG
K - None Picked*
DEF - NY Jets
BN - Carson Palmer - CIN
BN - Darren Sproles - SD
BN - Michael Bush - OAK
BN - Jerricho Cotchery - NYJ
BN - Donald Driver - GB
BN - Bobby Engram - KC
BN - Mike Vick* - Free Agent

*I planned on picking a kicker in the last round, but I had the second-to-last pick so any kicker I would've ended up with would be mediocre. So I took Vick. I hate Vick, but my thinking was that I'll hold on to him for the next few weeks to see if he signs anywhere. If he does I can keep him or trade him. If he doesn't I drop him and pick up the kicker I would've drafted anyway.

Thank you, Old Man

2009-07-17T12:59:00.003-04:00

Thank you, Old Man!

Today was the perfect day for you to back into my car with your Avalanche. What makes it even better is that...

1. Your shirt was on inside out.
2. You were backing out of a handicapped spot.
3. I was beeping at you to stop.
4. A woman was flailing her arms at you to get you to stop.
5. Your wife thought everything was funny, especially the rubber toy grenade on the ground about 20 yards away.
6. You couldn't provide insurance information.

Here's to faith in humanity.... please pay up, please....

Rules of Engagement

2009-07-13T16:41:00.025-04:00

If slacking at blogging was skiing then I'd be first to the bottom of the mountain.

I'm not sure that made sense.

Well, the big news first: Barb & I are engaged! Woo-hoo!
Now, the 101 update:

8.) Get under 185lbs - I did. I'm currently at the 180 mark, which gives me some room to play with when it comes to #9 (remain under 185lbs). I'm not sure how to measure that because I think it's unfair that if I slip to 186 for a day it disqualifies the entire thing. Maybe I'll weigh in once a month and average it all out. Regardless, the first part is done.

35.) Send an (extremely weird, non-sensical) message in a bottle - I did. Over July 4th weekend Barb and I hosted Craig, Carla, Derby, and Erin down at her parent's place. At around midnight on Saturday, and a few drinks in, I whipped out my glass bottle, a pen, and a sheet of paper. I started the letter and proceeded to pass the note around in a circle until everyone added a few lines. I wish I transcribed it but I didn't. However, I know it included losing my virginity to the Beastie Boys, cherry picking, Neverland Ranch, and ended with "Dammit". Amazingly, we weren't lazy and walked down to the ocean and chucked it in for some very lucky person to find.

51.) Brew my own beer - I did. A few weeks ago I went over Jim's house and we went to the local home brew store. We picked out the ingredients we'd need for a nice Bavarian Wheat Beer and went back to his place to get started. I went back this past weekend to bottle it and can't wait for it to carbonate. Should be about 2 weeks before I tell you how good it is.

The Brewmaster himself:

54.) Cook 50 New Recipes - not quite there. So far I've made 38 out of 50, which is a tremendous pace. Being that some of these were made over July 4th weekend when I was in the midst of hosting / celebrating I got lazy and didn't bring my camera out. The real shame is not having a pic of the ahi because it featured the best damn grill marks I've ever made! At least I have eye witnesses.
Dijon Grilled Pork Chops:
Grilled Eggplant and Tomato:
BBQ Alaskan Salmon:
Corny Cous-Cous
Seared Ahi w/ Wasabi Vinaigrette over Baby Greens
Crispy Potato Cakes

62.) Re-learn CSS - I kinda did so I'm counting it. This was a goal of mine because I hope to go back to school for web design and/or programming. For those of you who don't know, CSS is a language similar to HTML that allows you to stylize and layout the content of your web site. It's like learning a new language, and is kind of tricky, but I would say I have the basics down. This past weekend I built our entire wedding site. It's currently not live, but once we confirm our reception site I'm going to post it.

65.) Learn 5 "popular" (read: recognizable) songs on the guitar - 2 of 5 - The Beatles - "Can't Buy Me Love". The chords aren't hard, but I'm terrible at deciphering strumming patterns. Luckily, I found the strumming pattern online and can play along to it now. If they posted strumming patterns along w/ every tab I'd be a happy guy.

73.) Compile a playlist of my favorite song each week for a year - added some more. This one always makes me realize how long it's been between 101 updates...
The Dodos - Fools
Don Lennon - Junior Year Abroad
Good Old War - Looking for Shelter
Maritime - Parade of Punk Rock T-Shirts
Passion Pit - Little Secrets

78.) Read 30 books by 30 different authors - 2 more added bring the total to 13 of 30. I believe both of these were recommended by one Jennifer Scanlon, and coincidentally, today is her birthday. Happy Birthday, Jen!
Ray Bradbury - Fahrenheit 451
Cormac McCarthy - The Road ... Honestly, this is one of the best books I've ever come across. I highly highly recommend it. Seriously.

94.) Photograph 5 sunrises in 5 different places - 1 of 5 done. I stayed up for the full 24 hours during Relay for Life and got the shot below. It's not the most stunning sunrise ever, but that's not part of the deal.
95.) Photograph 5 sunsets in 5 different places - 2 of 5 done. The first pic below is the sunset that came before the aforementioned sunrise. Again, nothing great but it counts. I'm also including a second one below it that I got on the 4th of July at LBI. It doesn't count towards my total because I already took one at LBI, but it's nice enough to include.
Some random photos from the past few weeks:

Long Island Wants to Secede

2009-06-16T15:39:00.001-04:00

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart

Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c

Long Island Wants to Secede

thedailyshow.com

Daily Show
Full Episodes

Political Humor

Jason Jones in Iran

11pm-12am on Comedy Central = Best Hour of TV (when LOST isn't in season)

A Joke From Mom

2009-06-15T12:57:00.003-04:00

Mrs. Kohler:

2 young brothers are in a convenience store. They bring a box of tampons up to the cashier. The man behind the counter says, "Boys, do you know what these are?"
The older boy: "No."
The cashier: "Are you buying them for your mom? Your sister?"
The older boy: "Nope."
The cashier: "Then why on Earth would you want to buy these?"
The older boy: "I'm buying them for my brother. On the box it says 'you can swim, ride a bike, and play tennis.' He can't do any of these things!"

She heard this joke in church.

Brad Pitt Stop

2009-06-14T10:01:00.000-04:00

I'll copy and past the full article:

"Brad Pitt is accustomed to stopping passersby in their tracks. The Hollywood heartthrob's next job is slowing traffic in Siberia... or so Russian traffic police hope.

A Russian newspaper reports that cardboard cutouts of Pitt dressed as a traffic cop have been placed by the most dangerous intersections in the city of Omsk.

It's the latest move by authorities in their endless battle against speeding. Traffic accidents in Russia are among the highest in Europe.

The campaign seems to be working. Omsk officials say accidents are down as star-struck drivers ease off the gas to gaze at the unusual image."

Kodachrome

2009-06-12T08:00:00.001-04:00

Some recent shots that don't have frames:

Burn, Baby, Burn

2009-06-11T12:00:00.001-04:00

"Most of us can't rush around, talk to everyone, know all the cities of the world, we haven't time, money or that many friends. The things you're looking for are in the world, but the only way the average chap will ever see ninety-nine percent of them is in a book. Don't ask for guarantees. And don't look to be saved in any one thing, person, machine, or library. Do your own bit of saving, and if you drown, at least die knowing you were headed for shore."

- Faber, from "Fahrenheit 451" by Ray Bradbury

Obey 101

2009-06-10T15:10:00.015-04:00

Some 101 updating is due:

54. I have now cooked 32 out of 50 recipes (can you tell I burn through a ton of charcoal and enjoy the taste of corn?):

Spicy Grilled Chicken
Grilled Sweet Potatoes
Curry Grilled Chicken
Grilled Pork with Avocado Salsa & Campfire Potatoes
Summer Vegetable Medley
55. There's not much I enjoy more than enjoying a beer in a brewery. It's like drinking milk straight from the nipple. I tackled my 2nd of 5 breweries while in Boston last week. After walking approximately 9 miles we stopped in to the Boston Beer Works outside of Fenway. Now, I know this falls on the wussy side of the beer line, but I went with a Watermelon Ale. I had to. I had never heard of such a thing, and I'll admit it was damn good and refreshing.
73. 3 more songs of the week... I can't believe I've been hacking at this list for more than half a year already...
Phoenix - 1901
Bruce Springsteen - I'm On Fire
The Church - Metropolis

75. I didn't report on this originally because I didn't even realize I did it, but a few months ago I checked out the University of Pennsylvania's Institute of Contemporary Art in Philly with Shu and Sheila. This past week, when I went to visit Jackie and Chris in Boston, we checked out Boston's Institute of Contemporary Art. It was pretty awesome because they had a Shepard Fairey exhibit entitled "Supply & Demand." Shepard Fairey is the guy behind the iconic Obama image seen everywhere during his campaign for President. They had the original on display, plus tons and tons of his "Andre the Giant Has a Possse" work. Yes, the same guy is behind both. It was a terribly inspiring and crushing exhibit to say the least. So... 75 = 2/5.

101. I was so close to fulfilling this one that it hurts. Damn you Ian Toth!!!!

Thank you Jackie.
Thank you Chris.
Thank you Dave, for driving.

Grand Slam

2009-06-08T08:17:00.001-04:00

Congrats Mr. Federer. You finally did it.

Guitar Dog

2009-05-21T10:56:00.002-04:00

"Among God's creations, two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes in order not to be separated from the man."

- Andres Segovia

Weekends. I Prefer the Weekends.

2009-05-17T20:49:00.009-04:00

The last 2 weekends have be absolutely killer (pun intended). Not only were they random and fun, but they helped chip away at the 101.

The last 2 weekends combined:
The Killers at Susquehanna Bank Center
Brian & Dawn's Bridal Party party
Gaslight Anthem at the Stone Pony
Long Beach Island
Carla & Craig's Wedding
Andrea & Dan's Italian Market Festival Party
The Shins at the Electric Factory
Planting of our herb & flower garden

That being said...
54. This Gingered Honey Salmon recipe puts me over the halfway mark of my 50 recipe goal (26 of 50):
57. Now that the garden is planted I must maintain it until the end of the summer for it to count. The garden includes: red bell pepper, rosemary, cilantro, dill, thyme, chives, Thai basil, basil, parsley, and strawberries.
69. My show tally is now up to 7 out of 25.
73. 2 more songs of the week (24 of 52):
Conor Oberst & The Mystic Valley Band - "Nikorette"
Japandroids - "Young Hearts Spark Fire"
99. New place from our Philly guide book: Italian Market.

The Killers

2009-05-09T00:04:00.000-04:00

Best rock show I've ever seen.

Toffee With Your Vicodin

2009-05-08T15:56:00.004-04:00

Mini 101 Update:

54. 2 more recipes:
Rice, Black Bean, & Corn Salad

Apple Thyme Chicken

69. Saw The Pains of Being Pure at Heart at the Barbary with Andrea & Dan. I don't have any pictures, but I've provided a lil' video for y'all. A buzz band that's buzz worthy... nice.

73. Song for the week ending on 05.03.2009: Keane - "The Lovers Are Losing"

Also, updated this post with recipe pics.

Hobbits

2009-05-07T11:21:00.002-04:00

"The foot that proves Hobbits may have existed."

Full article here.

Tied

2009-05-04T16:07:00.002-04:00

61. Learn how to tie a tie. Out of necessity, it is done. Proof:
How did I do it? The Internet!!! Tell me this guy isn't completely weird (best part: 2min 20 sec):

Biweekly

2009-05-04T15:31:00.004-04:00

The state of Pennsylvania has me claiming benefits "biweekly". To me, this would mean twice a week, but what they mean is twice a month. To see who was right I went to dictionary.com. Now I have another reason to be confused by the English language:

"bi-week-ly [bahy-week-lee]
–adjective
occurring every two weeks.
occurring twice a week."

Phew

2009-05-03T14:58:00.005-04:00

Big 101 in 1001 Update:

7. Went to the dentist. Twice.
14. I was able to access my college computer without having to enter my password. Turns out there's an easy way around it and I was able to get access to all of my files. The computer is still at my parents, so I'll have to bring a drive next time, but I did gain access so I'm counting it.
29 & 42. I planted 10 trees via plantabillion.org (it's only $1 a tree so do it!). The first 5 trees cover #29 and the second 5 trees cover "Do something worthwhile on Earth Day." I wanted to do something out in the world on Earth Day, but it sort of snuck up on me. I couldn't find any last minute clean-ups or anything like that in the area, so I'm counting the tree planting.
47. I sold 5 things on eBay. They all happened to be DVDs I'd never watch again in a hundred years. They're out of the house and I made money.
54. 3 more recipes down:
Fish Ragout with Limes

Chicken Breasts with Rosemary & Lemon

Chinese Pork & Vegetable Stir-Fry

65. I learned to play along to Tom Petty's "Free Fallin'". So what if it's only 3 chords in the same pattern over and over for the entire song? It's recognizable. It counts.
69. Attended 3 shows:
Gaslight Anthem / Heartless Bastards at the Trocadero
Death Cab for Cutie / Cold War Kids at the Tower Theater
Bruce Springsteen & the E Street Band at the Spectrum
... which brings me to 70. I photographed the Gaslight Anthem gig (pics here & here) and the Death Cab show (pics to come) so that's 2 out of 3. Now, the Death Cab show is kind of tricky but I'm counting it. I received the photo pass from Ra Ra Riot's management, but they went on earlier than they were supposed to and we missed them. The Cold War Kids started basically as soon as we arrived so I didn't have my bearings about me. I was only allowed in this corner with a terrible view of the stage, so I got photos but they kind of suck. Then I found out that Death Cab had a separate photo pass and I wouldn't be allowed to shoot them. However, we had pretty close seats and I was able to snap a few before getting busted by security.
71. I took a really long freakin' time but this one (Geek-out on iTunes #1: [assign Year, Genre, and Album Art to all songs]) is done. You try doing that without going crazy during the process. Unemployment definitely helped this one get done...
73. Some new songs to the ongoing playlist:
... And You Will Know Us By the Trail of Dead - "Bells of Creation"
Love - "Maybe the People Would Be the Times or Between Clark and Hilldale"
Yeah Yeah Yeahs - "Zero"
Silversun Pickups - "Panic Switch"
Superchunk - "Learned to Surf (Acoustic Demo)"
74. I recyced my old iPod through Apple when the hard drive crashed. In doing so I was given a discount off of my totally awesome new 120gb iPod. Screw iPhones.
76. 2 Best Picture Winners out of 15: saw Slumdog Millionaire.
78. More books are done:
"Obama: A Promise of Change" by David Mendell... I should tell you that this is a children's adaptation of an adult book, but it was a gift, so I read it. It was close to 200 pages and I did learn stuff about Obama that I didn't know before so it counts.
"The Reader" by Bernhard Schlink
"Running with Scissors" by Augusten Burroughs
99. We've gone to a few places in the guide book I had never gone before:
The Wachovia Spectrum
Buddakan
The Trocadero

Phew.

No Reservations

2009-05-03T14:40:00.003-04:00

"Travel isn't always pretty.
It isn't always comfortable.
Sometimes it hurts.
It even breaks your heart.
But that's OK.
The journey changes you.
It should change you.
It leaves marks on your memory,
on your consciousness,
on your heart,
and on your body.
You take something with you.
Hopefully, you leave something good behind."

-Anthony Bourdain; taken from No Reservations: Malaysia.

Observations

2009-04-23T11:58:00.000-04:00

Josh Elliott and Hannah Storm have to be having sex.

Bye Tom

2009-04-23T10:43:00.003-04:00

Although I stopped going on MySpace on a daily basis over a year, maybe 2 years, ago this news pulls on my heartstrings, makes me feel old, and has the phrase "Damn the Man!" ringing in my ears: Tom, your automatically added friend, is stepping down as the man behind MySpace. I know he stopped doing this alone years ago, but the fact that he's leaving his child makes me feel strange.

The Reader

2009-04-15T10:07:00.003-04:00

"I thought that if the right time gets missed, if one has refused or been refused something for too long, it's too late, even if it is finally tackled with energy and received with joy. Or is there no such thing as 'too late'? Is there only 'late', and is 'late' always better than 'never'? I don't know."

- Bernhard Schlink, The Reader

Dear Mr. President,

2009-04-13T15:37:00.000-04:00

You can add me to the unemployment list. Thank you.

Don't Eat Her Cookies

2009-04-13T12:00:00.002-04:00

My aunt's mom died.
She was cremated.
The urn was expensive.
My Godfather went to HomeGoods.
The ashes are in a flour canister.

The Gaslight Anthem

2009-03-29T14:52:00.007-04:00

I saw the Gaslight Anthem last night at the Troc and they were freakin' amazing. Get on the bandwagon now because they're going to be huge by tomorrow.

Heartless Bastards

2009-03-29T14:44:00.010-04:00

ShamWowThat'sFunny

2009-03-28T00:06:00.001-04:00

ShamWow pitchman Vince Shlomi was arrested on felony battery charges in Miami last month following a violent encounter with a hooker!

High Society

2009-03-27T10:42:00.001-04:00

I'd miss the punk rock music.

Not the Hare

2009-03-26T14:00:00.005-04:00

54. All of this time off from work has allowed me to get some time in the kitchen. The most recent dish: Bison Chili.

73. Yeasayer's "Tightrope" off of the "Dark Was the Night" compilation. It's a pretty sick comp, plus its for a good cause- check out the track listing.

78. Finished Kurt Vonnegut's "Slaughterhouse-Five." I like his style. I vaguely remember this being in the English curriculum back in middle school or high school, although I was never assigned it. After reading it I can't believe all of he boring stuff I was forced to read.

95. I photographed my first of 5 sunsets while we were at LBI this previous weekend.

Seven

2009-03-25T19:42:00.005-04:00

Happy Birthday, Sadie. Its your day. You do what you want.

Chicken Skin

2009-03-25T18:24:00.003-04:00

Directed by Spike Jonze, screenplay by David Eggers, and a trailer set to the Arcade Fire's "Wake Up"? Chicken skin.

If I Twittered, I Might Twitter This...

2009-03-24T19:08:00.002-04:00

bison chili is'a cookin' on the stove top yum yum yum i just cut a jalapeno then picked my nose ow ow ow

Over the Tasman Sea - April 2004

2009-03-20T12:20:00.002-04:00

Little By Little

2009-03-19T20:35:00.010-04:00

Some list progress:

39. Found a local school that had a paper-only dumpster that doubles as a fund-raising apparatus (read more here). What did I recycle? Those damn phone books I hated so much.
54. Tackled 6 more recipes:

- Easy Seafood Stir-Fry

- Tortilla Espanola

- Cumin, Honey, and Mint-Marinated Lamb Chops with CousCous w/ Green Peas and Mint

- Lemon Grilled Chicken Breast with Grilled Asparagus

73. Some more "Songs of the Week":
- 14. The Violent Femmes - "I Held Her In My Arms"
- 15. Animal Collective - "Summertime Clothes"

I posted earlier that I hung my world map and dartboard, but I didn't post pictures. Now I did:

Groceries

2009-03-18T15:35:00.002-04:00

I went grocery shopping. My checkout person and my bagger were arguing over whether or not Hitler was gay, and if he had a mistress. I've never heard grocery store employees discussing Hitler. This should happen more often.

Vonnegut

2009-03-16T19:52:00.002-04:00

"And I asked myself about the present: how wide it was, how deep it was, how much was mine to keep."

R.I.P. S.M.K.

2009-03-16T17:29:00.006-04:00

Today marks my last day working on Spice Up My Kitchen. It figures that once we figured out how to eliminate 13 hour days we wouldn't get renewed. It's been a fun ride that took me from the shores of New Jersey to the suburbs of Philadelphia, and culminated with me producing my very first episode, which just happened to be our very last. I hope there's no direct correlation there... Anyway, make sure to catch all 78 kitchen renovations on HGTV.

Headlines

2009-03-13T16:19:00.003-04:00

To find all of these in 1 day is very freakin' wonderful:

Woman Buys Used Couch, Finds Cat Living Inside
Couch only cost $27!

10 Kids Drink Windshield Wiper Fluid At Daycare
Why didn't the first kid tell the other 9 kids?

Israeli Hiker Falls to Death Out of Rescue Helicopter
My kids will probably be mentally handicapped because I find this funny.

Corpse Delivered to Pet Store
Whole new meaning to "Sleeping with the Fishes"

Credit

2009-03-09T20:22:00.005-04:00

John Mee made me happy today. He told me a photo I took of his band, Iron Chic, had been published in a UK rock rag called, "Rock Sound". Furthermore, I had been credited. I guess this counts as being published, which is kind of cool. I picked up my $9 imported copy after work to see it for myself and now you can see it for yourself (click photo to enlarge).

You can listen to them on MySpace and see more photos I took of them. If you choose.

World War 3

2009-03-09T17:21:00.002-04:00

... it will be a "perfect storm" if you will. If you think about it, it all makes sense.

Primates will learn how to talk and drive at the same time computers learn to think for themselves, and before you know it there will be a full blown world war: humans vs. primates vs. cyborg killing machines vs. mother nature.

The logical conclusion? We become pirates. The ice caps will melt due to Global Warming, drastically reducing our land. We'll take to the sea, where the primates can't swim and the cyborgs can't function. We'll live on boats, fighting off scurvy, and growing facial hair.

We're screwed.

Whoring

2009-03-09T13:11:00.002-04:00

I'm a Pitchfork whore. As much as I hate them at times, I love them just as much, and they definitely speed along a slow work day. I logged on this morning to find a complete re-work of the site. I was skeptical at first, but I think they did a really nice job. Plus, their address is now "pitchfork.com", instead of "pitchforkmedia.com", something that has always bothered me a ton.

I suppose this post is the equivalent to wearing a giant Nike swoosh across your t-shirt, but, like I said, I'm a whore.

Andrea & Snoop

2009-03-08T20:56:00.001-04:00

Andrea, in the kitchen: "Oooh! I found chocolate covered pretzels!"

Snoop Dogg, in my headphones: "Can we get a moment of mother-fuckin' silence up in here?!"

I don't know... I found it funny.

Sodium

2009-03-06T13:50:00.004-05:00

When I lived in Hawaii I worked at a restaurant called Aunti Pasto's. Great place. It was owned by this guy, Ed. Great guy. One Saturday morning, shortly after I was hired, we had a staff meeting. The purpose of the meeting was to educate the staff about what they were serving. For example, "If someone tells you they're trying to watch their cholesterol you do NOT recommend the Carbonara." And so on. Eventually he started talking about salt. "Do you know how much salt you're supposed to have a day? This much," he said as he held up the smallest pinch of salt between his fingers. "You should never, EVER, have to put salt on your food because of all the salt that's being put in your food for you." Since that day I very rarely reach for the salt shaker- Not because I care that much about my salt intake, but because whenever I reach for the salt shaker I can't help but think of Ed, and his passion, and I feel guilty. I already feel guilty about enough things in life, so, no, I don't need the salt on top of that.

AND

My mother, Jo Ann, used to, and actually still does, get her hair colored and permed by, coincidentally, another Joanne. If I remember correctly, she's my mom's sister's ex-husband's son's ex-wife. F'real. Once, when I was in elementary school she doing my mom's hair on the back patio, Coors Light in tow (my Mom always made my Dad buy Coors Light cans when Joanne was coming over). The Magic were playing the Knicks that night, and I really wanted to watch because I owned 3 Shaq jerseys, but we didn't get MSG. Hoping I might get invited over, I asked Joanna, "Do you get MSG?"

"No, I don't really like Chinese food."

I didn't see the game that night. And considering how long ago this memory seems, it's remarkable that Shaq is still in the league.

Repeater

2009-03-06T09:35:00.002-05:00

I'm thoroughly surprised that it's not a bigger deal that certain birds can talk. It's astonishing, really.

Rose Bank

2009-03-04T23:06:00.006-05:00

There's some list crossing-offing to be done.

96. Done. Went to the Rose Bank Winery this past Saturday w/ Barb, Helen, & Steven. Wasn't the best wine in the world, but it wasn't too shabby, and it was definitely an experience. Cross it off!

78. Another book down, this one from the 33 1/3 series: Meat Is Murder by Joe Pernice, of the somewhat average power-pop band the Pernice Brothers. It's the only book in the series that's fiction and it didn't really work. Didn't live up to my expectations. If you don't know what Meat Is Murder is, or for that matter, who the Smiths are, do NOT pick up this book.

73. Song of the Week: "Last Dance" by the Mekons off of Fear & Whiskey.

PS - This post has been updated with pictures.

Bobby Jindal

2009-02-25T13:29:00.004-05:00

I really don't like this guy. Watching his response to Obama's Congressional Address was outright painful. Nobody wants to follow an Obama speech, but that sing-songy load of crap was pathetic. You can watch the full video here. Just watch the first 2 minutes to get the point. This isn't just because I love Obama; Jindal's speech has been practically universally slammed.

Also, something that I noticed live last night, and found terribly funny, has been picked up by the online community: As MSNBC cuts away to Jindal's live speech somebody didn't kill (we have to assume) Keith Olbermann's mic quick enough. Listen to the very clear, and disgusted sounding, "oh, God..." as Jindal approaches the mic.

UPDATE: It was actually Chris Matthews who uttered the "Oh, God" and he doesn't seem to care. Good for him.

Lastly, I'm relatively new to following the world of politics, but it seemed like Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi, stood up quite often during last night's address. I found one site reporting that she stood up 34 times during the 1 hour speech. Hemroids?

If SNL is live this week they were just given 2 early Christmas presents.

List Erosion

2009-02-23T15:01:00.018-05:00

This whole 101 / 1001 thing is long overdue for an update.

5. I've completed 100 push-ups a day for a month.
13. I've eaten an apple every day for a month.
15. I abstained from microwave usage for an entire month.
16. I didn't fart in front of Barb for 1 month straight. I swear. You can ask her.
17. I didn't drink diet soda for a month. I've had it since, but far less frequently.
21. I backed up all of photos, music, random files, etc. onto an external hard drive.
23. Finally hung my dart board.
24. Mounted my world map and hung it in the living room. Looks awesome.
33. I'm up to 5 of my 30 letters to people I care about but don't really talk to.
41. I've fallen off my pace, but I'm up to 20,800 grains of rice donated on freerice.com
54. I've cooked 13 new recipes out of 50 (pictures above recipe).

- Shrimp w/ Snow Peas
- Grilled Chinese Salmon

- One-Pan Pork Fu Yung

- Chicken Chow Mein

- Thai Curry Stir-Fry
- Roast Sesame Fish

- Spicy Beef & Broccoli Stir-Fry

- Bacon-Wrapped Shrimp w/ Bacon & Gorgonzola
- Turkey Sausage & Hazelnut Stuffed Mushrooms
- Sausage & Chili Tartlets
- Cilantro Aioli
- Emeril's Tiramisu

- Easy Enchiladas
55. Drank at Barley Creek Brewing Company, so 1 out of 5 breweries are done. I'm not drunk in this picture; this is what I look like after snowboarding and 1 beer.

73. Song-A-Week Playlist, now up to 12 songs:
- Parts & Labor - Nowheres Nigh
- Bon Iver - Skinny Love
- David Byrne & Brian Eno - Strange Overtones
- Titus Andronicus - Titus Andronicus
- The Jam - The City
- Archers of Loaf - Web In Front
- Pavement - Harness Your Hopes
- Bright Eyes - I Woke Up With This Song In My Head This Morning
- Billy Bragg - New England
- Fleet Foxes - Mykonos
- The Pains of Being Pure At Heart - Stay Alive
- Morrissey - All You Need Is Me
76. I saw my first "Best Picture" winner: No Country for Old Men. Despite being fully engaged from beginning to end, I can't say I was blown away by it, although I think it was very well done and would recommend it.
78. I'm up to 6 of 30 books read. New additions since the last update:
- The Pitchfork 500: Our Guide to the Greatest Songs from Punk to the Present editing by by Scott Plagenhoef and Ryan Schreiber
- Last King of Scotland by Giles Foden
- The Travel Book: A Journey Through Every Country in the World by Lonely Planet Publications

Passport Neglect

2009-02-22T17:32:00.006-05:00

My Top 10 List of Countries I'd Love to Visit:

- note 1: not in order.
- note 2: New Zealand and Australia have been excluded, although I (constantly) dream of going back.

Belize (because I've heard nothing but good things)
Canada (because it's so damn close)
Chile (because the pictures I've seen are absurd)
Denmark (because it's supposed to be the happiest country on the planet)
Germany (because of hereditary reasons... and beer)
Iceland (because it doesn't look like it belongs to this planet)
Ireland (see Germany)
Japan (because of Lost In Translation & sushi)
Thailand (because I want to taste real Thai food)
Virgin Islands (because I've been to "paradise", but not this region of it)

America™

2009-02-21T17:34:00.005-05:00

I just finished reading The Travel Book: A Journey Through Every Country in the World by Lonely Planet. Great book. They profile 230 countries (some territories, etc.), with each country getting 2 pages of coverage, mostly dominated by photos. Each country also gets a section called "Trademarks" where they list what each country is known for, or what you're bound to encounter while there. I found the United States of America's trademarks to be a little... well, shitty. Here they are, presented without altercation or omission:

"Burgers, fries, and Budweiser; red-white-and-blue T-shirts; sneaker and jeans; yuppies in SUVs, cowboys in pickups; loud people; gun lovers; dangerous cities"

Yesterday vs. Today

2009-02-20T17:34:00.001-05:00

Yesterday was awesome because: 3 different women bought me my breakfast, my lunch, and my dinner.

Today wasn't awesome because: I found out that I owe the IRS some money.

WTF: Tinted Windows

2009-02-19T23:01:00.003-05:00

"According to Billboard.com, there's a new band that exists on earth called Tinted Windows featuring former Smashing Pumpkin James Iha, Cheap Trick drummer Bun E. Carlos, handsome Hanson brother Taylor, and Fountains of Wayne bassist Adam Schlesinger."

I don't even know what to think. More on this story right over... here.

UPDATE: Their self-titled debut will be out on 04.21.09.

Merry Christmas!!!!!!!

2009-02-18T13:25:00.004-05:00

Christmas letter from my Aunt... (click to enlarge... please)

If I Was A Legislator...

2009-02-17T17:20:00.004-05:00

if i was a legislator, i'd propose that phone books would be made available upon request, but they would not be automatically delivered to every house. we just got 2 thick phone books dropped off at our apartment, and since we can use the internet, we're never go to use these phone books! ever! it's like receiving a chunk of pollution on your doorstep and it makes you feel guilty for having a residence.

Perks of Death Row

2009-02-12T09:54:00.004-05:00

I'm not saying I'd want to be on Death Row, but at least you get to pick your last meal. Usually you die unexpectedly, and who knows what you just ate. If you consider the act of eating to be more than something you do to live and more of an experience, this is a pretty nice thing to offer somebody who has presumably done something very bad. It almost seems too nice. This is also assuming that this actually occurs. I could see this being the case back in the day, but in today's institutions I think it's more about getting down to business.

If I had to pick my last meal I'd probably go with some sort of surf and turf. Perhaps a fillet Mignon, medium-rare, with a rich Bearnaise sauce or Gorgonzola crust, and sauteed onions and mushrooms on the side. For the seafood half, I'd have to say that a few pounds of King Crab legs, partially cracked, would do the trick.

This being said, I'm not going to kill somebody to get this meal. I'll save some money and go to the Library II.

Oh, and this was brought on by last night's Top Chef.

Best Albums of 2008

2009-01-02T15:32:00.009-05:00

Here's a list of my favorite albums from the year known as "2008".

1. The Gaslight Anthem - The '59 Sound
2. Frightened Rabbit - The Midnight Organ Fight
3. TV on the Radio - Dear Science
4. Vampire Weekend - Vampire Weekend
5. Conor Oberst - Conor Oberst
6. Ra Ra Riot - The Rhumb Line
7. M83 - Saturdays = Youth
8. Death Cab for Cutie - Narrow Stairs
9. Fleet Foxes - Fleet Foxes
10. Tokyo Police Club - Elephant Shell
11. Los Campesinos! - Hold On Now, Youngster
12. R.E.M. - Accelerate
13. Cut Copy - In Ghost Colours
14. Parts & Labor - Receivers
15. Nada Surf - Lucky
16. Los Campesinos! - We Are Beautiful, We Are Doomed
17. Santogold - Santogold
18. School of Seven Bells - Alpinisms
19. Coldplay - Viva la Vida
20. Bon Iver - For Emma, Forever Ago
21. Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin - Pershing
22. MGMT - Oracular Spectacular
23. Army Navy - Army Navy
24. My Morning Jacket - Evil Urges
25. The Holdsteady - Stay Positive
26. The Raconteurs - Consolers of the Lonely
27. The Killers - Day & Age
28. Stephen Malkmus & the Jicks - Real Emotional Trash
29. Jack Johnson - Sleep Through the Static
30. Broken Social Scene Presents Brendan Canning - Something For All of Us...
31. Raveonettes - Lust Lust Lust
32. The Teenagers - Reality Check
33. Robert Forster - The Evangelist
34. The Whigs - Mission Control
35. The Last Shadow Puppets - The Age of the Understatement
36. Jaguar Love - Take Me to the Sea
37. Port O'Brien - All We Could Do Was Sing
38. The Stills - Oceans Will Rise
39. Why - Alopecia?
40. Beck - Modern Guilt

I'm Sick of Apples

2008-12-23T12:23:00.003-05:00

I'm sick of apples. I really am.

So, here's a lil' 101 in 1001 update:

5 & 13. I've eaten an apple and have done 100 push-ups a day since 12.03.2008.
16. I've gone a week straight without. This shouldn't be this this hard.
32. I donated money to Eileen Stein Jacoby Fund.
33. I sent a letter to Karen Opitz.
41. I've been slacking with freerice.com ever since being on break from work. What does that say about what I do at work? To date I've donated 11,000 grains of rice.
73. 2 weeks = 2 songs. Bon Iver's "Skinny Love" and the David Byrne & Brian Eno collaboration "Strange Overtones". Both very nice.

Skinny Love - Bon Iver

78. 2 weeks and 2 more books. First was "Invisible Monsters" by Chuck Palahniuk. He's always weird and this didn't disappoint. Second was a classic, "Catcher In the Rye" by J.D. Salinger. I was intrigued because of the whole John Lennon thing, and I'll admit that I was scared I'd read it and kill someone, but so far that hasn't happened yet. I think I liked it. I wasn't crazy about it, but it was definitely worth my time. Plus, I like when a book's cover makes sense when you're done with it.

I also can't help but share this video. Look past the immature title and give it a chance.

Happy Holidays!

Bye Bye 25

2008-12-09T22:45:00.004-05:00

if nothing else, this 101 in 1001 gives me something to do, or at least think about, when i have nothing to do and not much to think about. 1 week has gone by and some progress has been made:

5. & 13. i've done 100 push-ups and eaten an apple a day for a week straight
16. is really hard. i've failed multiple times.
33. sent emails to amy mchugh, sheryl burger, and tom ellis.
41. i've donated 7,000 grains of rice on freerice.com
73. song of the week: parts & labor - "nowheres nigh"
78. read "love is a mixtape" by rob sheffield. i'd recommend it if you really like music. if not, it could become really annoying.

a friend of mine from college, brandon richter, has posted his 101 in 1001. it's a movement!

Dog Eat Dog World

2008-12-07T14:52:00.003-05:00

on saturday morning sadie got in a fight with another dog in our apartment complex. this other dog was huge; definitely had some pit bull in him. what happened was barb was leaving to go to yoga and this other dog was in the court yard running around while his owner sat outside their door. the dog saw barb and galloped over in a playful way, and sadie thought he was going to attack barb, so sadie shot out the door and they met head on. i didn't see this, but this is how it was told to me. i was on the computer when i heard barb screaming and dogs growling and barking. everything from there is a blur. i remember running outside and jumping on the other dog and trying to get sadie out of his mouth. i know the other dog was under me between my leg and my hands were around his neck/mouth/head. i just remember barb and the other dog's owner screaming. somehow, and i really don't know how, i let the dog go and his owner was trying to gain control of him and i had sadie in my arms and rushed inside and shut the door to make sure she was ok. the smell was awful. it smelled like dog shit was everywhere. i guess she released her anal sacks (that's a real thing). she was just howling and i was trying to calm her down. eventually she was quiet and i checked for blood, but i couldn't find any; just slobber. i brought her in our room and she went right under the bed and wouldn't come out. eventually barb pulled her out and we took her to the emergency vet. long story short, sadie is ok. she was in shock all day, but seems to have gotten her personality back today. apparently, she inflicted the most damage as the other dog was bleeding from his mouth; she either tore into his gums or bit his tongue. as the saying goes: "it's not the size of the dog in the fight; it's the size of the fight in the dog." my doxie is bad ass.

101 in 1001

2008-12-03T10:18:00.003-05:00

while surfing the internet one day i found myself on facebook. somehow, i ended up looking at the page of a kid who lived down the hall from me freshman year, but who i haven't spoken with in quite some time. i noticed he had a link to this blog/project he was doing so i checked it out. i was skeptical at first, but after reading about it i thought it to be a rather neat idea. his project, which you can read about here, has existed for a few year's now. it's called "101 in 1,001", or some variation of that. essentially, you compile a list of 101 things you want to accomplish, see, do, etc. over the course of the next 1,001 days (approximately 2.75 years). being a list-lover myself, i decided to create my own version.

i guess i don't expect a great number of you to partake in this, but it'd be cool to be doing this alongside a few friends. tell me if you decide to have a go at it. i can see it being a great motivational tool to finally accomplish some of the little things you keep putting off or the bigger goals you're too nervous to attempt.

My List:

Health & Fitness
1. Attend a yoga class with Barb
2. Complete 3 Marathons (0/3)
3. Complete 1 Triathlon
4. Feel comfortable enough to run with my shirt off at the beach
5. 100 push-ups a day for a month
6. Take a 1-hour tennis lesson
7. Go to the dentist
8. Get under 185 lbs.
9. Remain under 185 lbs.

Appearance
10. Get contacts
11. Get a 2nd tattoo
12. Get an expensive haircut

Personal Challenge
13. Eat an apple a day for a month
14. Access college computer (I forgot my Windows password)
15. Don't use the microwave for a month
16. Don't fart around Barb for a month
17. No diet soda for a month

Around the House
18. Clean random crap out of my parent's house
19. Get dents out of my car
20. Wax car twice a year
21. Back up all music, photos, etc on a separate hard drive
22. Organize all of my digital photos
23. Hang my dart board
24. Frame and hang my world map

Soul, Environment, & Friendship
25. Paint a room for someone
26. Write an email to my freshman year roommate
27. Write a letter to my High School football coach
28. Volunteer 3 separate times for 3 separate causes (0/3)
29. Plant 5 trees (0/5)
30. Send a post card to Auntie Pasto's in Hawaii
31. Do something charitable every Thanksgiving (0/2)
32. Do something charitable every X-Mas (0/3)
33. Write 30 random emails to people I don't talk to that often anymore (0/30)
34. Develop old rolls of film sitting around my parent's
35. Send an (extremely weird, non-sensical) message in a bottle
36. Be a "Dharma Bum" with Shu for 24 hours
37. Take Sadie on 3 doggie dates (0/3)
38. Send a package to Australia
39. Find out how / where to recycle paper and do it
40. Donate blood
41. Donate 100,000 grains of rice on freerice.com
42. Do something worthwhile on Earth Day
43. Donate a garbage bag filled with old clothes
44. Replace all of our light bulbs with compact fluorescent bulbs
45. Mail a secret to PostSecret

Finance
46. Consolidate my Student Loans
47. Sell 5 things on Amazon or eBay (0/5)
48. Use up all of my existing gift cards
49. Figure out my credit score
50. Save up for and buy a Mac

Food
51. Brew my own beer
52. Make sushi at home
53. Go to a Japanese restaurant and order something that isn't sushi
54. Cook 50 different recipes (0/50)
55. Drink at 5 different breweries (0/5)
56. Jar / bottle my own marinade, soup, and salsa (0/3)
57. Maintain an herb garden for an entire summer
58. Enjoy a glass of real spiked egg-nog (bonus: next to a fire!)
59. Have a good experience at an Indian restaurant with Barb

Personal Know-How
60. Learn to drive stick
61. Learn how to tie a tie
62. Re-learn CSS
63. Learn the basics of a popular editing program
64. Add internal hardware to a computer

Music
65. Learn 5 "popular" (read: “recognizable”) songs on the guitar (0/5)
66. Attend a multi-day music festival
67. Have a music review published (online counts)
68. Get a letter published in RollingStone (or at least write 30 letters)
69. Attend 25 concerts / shows (0/25)
70. Photograph 3 different shows (where I don't know the band) (0/3)
71. Geek-out on iTunes #1: (assign Year, Genre, and Album Art to all songs)
72. Geek-out on iTunes #2: Give star-ratings to all of my unrated songs in iTunes
73. Compile a playlist of my favorite song each week for a year
74. Give away or recycle my old iPod

The Arts
75. Visit 5 new museums, galleries, or exhibits (0/5)
76. See 15 "Best Film" Oscar winners (0/15)
77. Re-read the Lord of the Rings
78. Read 30 books by 30 different authors (0/30)

Personal Creativity
79. Re-edit my Australia photos and do something with them
80. Re-vamp my Web Site
81. Submit a t-shirt design to threadless.com
82. Edit the Lindenhurst slideshow that I scanned all of my photos in for
83. Enter a photo contest
84. Create a stop-motion animation short and post online
85. Paint a birdhouse

Adventures & Activities
86. Visit the West Coast
87. Camp 3 times in 3 new places (bonus: once with a group of friends) (0/3)
88. Move out of Bensalem (bonus: move out of the North East)
89. Go on a fishing trip (bonus: with my Dad)
90. Hike 5 new trails (0/5)
91. Go to Canada
92. Go to an archery range
93. Take a stadium tour
94. Photograph 5 sunrises in 5 different places (0/5)
95. Photograph 5 sunsets in 5 different places (0/5)
96. Go wine tasting with Barb
97. Stop at 10 roadside lookouts (0/10)
98. Rent jet-skis / wave-runners with Barb
99. Visit 10 new places in our Philly guide book (0/10)
100. Visit 3 National Parks (0/3)
101. Go on a road trip with Ian & Dave

I pledge to document this list to the best of my ability.

Furthermore, I promise to donate $5 to a non-profit for every item not completed.

McCain in "The Squirmer"

2008-07-10T22:30:00.003-04:00

Please take a moment and watch the video below. If you get enjoyment out of watching people freak out inside their head while trying to remain outwardly calm you can't get much better than this.

Why I'm Voting Republican... Psyche!

2008-06-23T16:50:00.003-04:00

Halfway to Hell Club / Iron Chic

2008-06-21T14:19:00.013-04:00

Last weekend I went home to Long Island. I was fortunate enough to check out some of my friend's bands play for the first time. Below are some shots from the show. Check out Halfway to Hell Club's MySpace page and listen to some tunes... I don't think Iron Chic has one yet.

Halfway to Hell Club

Iron Chic

Tony's Iron Man

2008-06-19T10:30:00.003-04:00

There’s this guy I know, Anthony Lombardi. We call him “Tony Lombardi” for short. I met him freshman year of college, and we wound up living together sophomore year… and junior year… and senior year. I couldn’t get rid of the guy! After college we kept in touch via the Internet, and we even saw each other in person every so often.

In line with his competitive trajectory, Tony announced he was going to be competing in an Iron Man this coming August in Louisville, Kentucky. By competing in this race he will honor the memory of his deceased friend, Jared, and raise money for the scholarship fund in his name back in their hometown of Southington, Connecticut.

Since I work in TV, Tony approached me about filming a mini-documentary of sorts detailing his journey to the Iron Man and why he’s doing it. Up for the challenge, I agreed. Together, we approached our alma mater, Marist College, about borrowing a camera for the race and they obliged. They were beyond generous and are letting us borrow a camera, mics, tri-pod, etc. from now until September. An ex-coworker and current friend of mine, Brian Epstein, agreed to handle editing duties.

We’ll be shooting some training footage and interviews throughout the summer, culminating at the race over Labor Day weekend. If I get any great still shots, or something worthwhile comes up, I’ll throw it up on here. If you wish to keep up to speed on Tony’s training you can check out his blog. Wish him luck.

Lara Logan

2008-06-18T13:52:00.005-04:00

If you know me, you know I’m a big advocate of The Daily Show. I feel like Jon Stewart’s interviews are generally insightful and thought-provoking, but last night’s episode featured one of the best interviews I’ve ever seen on his show. His guest was Lara Logan, Chief Foreign Correspondent for CBS News. Not only is she strikingly gorgeous with a sexy-as-hell accent, but she’s well-spoken, intelligent, and bad-ass. She’s embedded herself with Navy Seals, had her hotel blown up and survived, said, “What’s up, Mother Fuckers?” on air, and said that if she watched U.S. news she’d “blow her brains out.” Take the time and bask in the glory that is Lara Logan:

Proud to Be an American (?)

2008-06-17T15:45:00.004-04:00

Michelle Obama has received a lot of heat for her somewhat negligent comment about being a proud American for the first time. Yes, it was a poor choice of words. She probably didn’t mean for it to come across as anti-American. Whatever her intention, my question is: So what if she hasn’t been 100% proud to be an American? I’m not 100% proud to be an American. Sure, part of me is, but part of me isn’t. Last time I checked, “Pride” was one of the 7 Deadliest Sins. Look up “pride” and you’ll find that most definitions carry a negative connotation. Pride leads to stubbornness and stubbornness leads to loss and defeat.

Synonyms of pride: conceit, egotism, vanity. Antonym: humility.

It seems like most people are quick to say that “American is the greatest country on Earth”. This is nothing more than arrogant, blind Patriotism. I’ve asked people why they feel that we’re the best country, and I haven’t received a good answer. My mom’s response? “Because we’re the land of the free and the home of the brave”. Her answer was a slogan, a bumper sticker.

Yes, we’ve had our moments. Yes, we show signs of greatness. But I also see Tila Tequila on TV and shitheads on Fox News wasting my time talking about “terrorist fist jabs” and “Obama’s Baby Mama Drama”. There's a fucking war going on. I don't want to hear about him wearing or not wearing a lapel pin. He's running for the fucking Presidency and people are questioning his loyalty to this country? It’s cliché, but I shouldn’t be getting my news from the Daily Show or the Colbert Report, but I have to. Our press has no spine.

If we were the greatest country in the world Americans would wear American flag patches on their backpacks when they travel abroad like other countries do, but we don’t. Instead, our backpacks are blank while every single Canadian makes damn sure they have their flag on their backpack to avoid being mistaken as an American citizen.

I’ve had conversations with grown, “normal” adults who says Barack Obama will “paint the White House black”, and that’s actually their first argument against his campaign. At least know the facts, know where your guy stands, and have a legit reason for voting for them. I’ll admit that I have prejudices that I’m not proud of, but I am in no way racist. I am encountering “intelligent” people who “can’t vote for a black man” and it’s blowing my mind. If we were the greatest country on Earth our Middle Class would be educated enough and cultured enough to not make such ignorant comments.

I’m sick of hearing Obama’s not experienced enough; he meets every requirement necessary to be President. I’m sick of hearing about how he’s nothing more than just an eloquent speaker. At this point it’s obvious that our government isn’t run by one man; It’s that one man and the people he surrounds himself with. If he can motivate people, can energize them, and get them to care, than that’s the point. I trust that those around him will guide him, that he’ll listen to the people, and try something new as opposed to following the status quo that has done nothing but tarnish America’s image. Experience? Experience has gotten us nowhere. Our country is in a cluster-fuck and I’m ready to start from scratch.

You can fact-check here and read about the truthiness of anti-Obama rumors here.

Toilet Woes

2008-06-13T17:29:00.004-04:00

Know what sucks? When you poop at work, and as you're leaving the bathroom your boss is approaching the bathroom, and unknowingly says to you, "Ah, perfect timing!", and you want to say, "Actually, it's terrible timing", but you don't... and you can't look them in the eye for the rest of the day...

Obama Clinches

2008-06-03T22:58:00.003-04:00

Heck Yes.

China Is Scary

2008-06-02T15:04:00.008-04:00

This month’s RollingStone featured an article by Naomi Klein entitled “China’s All-Seeing Eye”. In the article, China’s obsession with surveillance technology was discussed, as well as what the U.S. is doing to aid it, and what we’re not doing to stop it. It was a lot to take in, but I feel there was a lot of information worth sharing. Below is my attempt to break it down in a way that’s easy to understand while keeping the facts in check. (Click here for the full article)

Shenzhen – A city in China with a population of 12.4 million people. 30 years ago this city did not exist. The city was built as an experiment, 1 of 4 areas in China where capitalism would be permitted while under the eye of the Communist Party.

Shenzhen makes iPods, laptops, sneakers, televisions, cell phones, jeans, furniture, cars, printers, etc. It has 9 Wal-Marts, and multiple U.S. fast-food chains line the streets.

Huawei is China’s telecom giant. Their research complex is so large that it has its own highway exit and city bus line for its employees.

As the Olympic Games in Beijing grow nearer, Shenzhen is being used as a testing ground for new surveillance equipment. In the last 2 years over 200,000 cameras have been installed, many hidden in lampposts. All of these cameras are on the same network, allowing the government to watch the entire city. In the next 3 years 2 million more cameras will be installed in Shenzhen.
- China’s surveillance camera market generated over $4 billion dollars last year.
- China’s government has ordered that all Internet cafes, restaurants, and entertainment venues install cameras with direct feeds to local police stations.

Golden Shield – China’s all-encompassing security network, with an end-goal of being able to watch its citizens through people-tracking technologies, thus preventing any uprisings before they can gather momentum. This network is made possible, in part, by U.S. companies such as IBM, Honeywell, and General Electric.

Citizens will be monitored on phone calls, be subjected to voice-recognition technology, have their Internet access limited by China’s “Great Firewall”, and have a national ID card with a computer chip storing personal info, as well as a photo, which can be uploaded at police stations. When Golden Shield is complete, there will be a database with information pertaining to all of China’s 1.3 billion citizens.

Golden Shield was recently tested during the riots in Tibet. China was able to limit, and in some cases, completely shut down Internet access. Outgoing calls were blocked, and police were actually able to text message citizens telling them to behave. The police later used surveillance footage from lamppost cameras to make a “highlight” reel of the most violent rioters contrasted with footage of police behaving with level-headed restraint. This propaganda piece was shown repeatedly on national news programs, and a most-wanted list of Tibetan rioters was compiled.

Ministry of Public Security in Beijing – is staging a “10-Million-Faces Test”. Companies in China will compete to see whose software is best able to implement face-recognition technology. The winners will be awarded fat government contracts and guaranteed business for years to come as their software is integrated with other Golden Shield Technology.

L-1 Identity Solutions (their web site is fucking sci-fi, Minority Report, Tom-Cruise-jumping-up-and-down-on-the-couch-crazy!) – Connecticut-based defense contractor. Maker of passports and biometric security systems. Former CIA director, George Tenet, is a board member. Thanks to government contracts, their expected 2011 revenue is over $1 billion.

L-1 has licensed its technology to a Chinese company called Pixel Solutions. Pixel Solutions, with the help of L-1’s software, hopes to be a winner in the 10-Million-Faces Test. This relationship may, or may not, be illegal in the U.S. After Tiananmen Square, the U.S. made it illegal for companies sell “crime control or detection instruments or equipment” to China. Because the U.S. government could not foresee such technology such as face-detection software, the L-1/Pixel Solution relationship has been allowed to exist.

L-1’s presence is China’s emerging surveillance markets is worrying because of what they do in the U.S. L-1 makes passports, takes finger prints of visitors to the U.S., supplies biometric equipment to U.S. soldiers, maintains our State Departments “largest facial-recognition database system”, and producers driver’s licenses in a handful of states.

L-1 is now offering a program called “Fly Clear” that will relieve people from waiting on long lines at the airport. To enroll in the program, one must get their fingerprints taken, their irises scanned, and carry a biometric chip with their personal info.

U.S. Companies Involved in Aiding or bowing down to China:
IBM, Honeywell, and General Electric have sold equipment and technology.

Google has made a special Chinese search engine that filters “sensitive” material.

Cisco has supplied hardware for the “Great Firewall”.

Microsoft has removed politically-charged blogs at Beijing’s request.

Yahoo has relinquished email-account info which led to multiple arrests, including that of a well-known journalist.

Chinese Companies of Note:
FSAN CCTV System makes 400,000 security cameras a year, half of which are exported to cities such as Manhattan and London.

China Security & Surveillance Technology has developed software to alert police when a large group of people have suddenly gathered.

Aebell Electrical Technologies has an English brochure to advertise their security cameras. The brochure features American iconography, including the New York skyline prior to 9/11. They’ll be going public on the Nasdaq by year’s end.

Misc.:
- “The U.S. currently has more people behind bars than China, despite a population less than a quarter of its size.”
- “The global homeland security business is now worth an estimated $200 billion – more than Hollywood and the music industry combined.”
- The Defense Department once tried to implement a plan similar to China’s Golden Shield. It was called “Total Information Awareness”, and a top executive at L-1 has a plan called “Operation Noble Shield.”

It’s amazing that we can stage a war with the intent of bringing democracy to a country, yet there are huge U.S. companies willing to alter their product to meet China’s undemocratic demands. In the U.S. we don’t care about democracy as much as we care about money… or Clay Aiken’s artificial insemination baby... Or how “Sex and the City” did at the box office (it beat “Indiana Jones”).

Australia Withdraws Troops

2008-06-01T11:50:00.006-04:00

In what seems like a big deal, but for some reason isn't being covered as such, Australia has officially declared to cease combat operations in Iraq. To symbolize this event, an Australian flag was lowered at a base in southern Iraq. This move makes good on a promise by Australia's new Prime Minister, Kevin Rudd, that he made during his campaign last year. Good on him for sticking to his word.

I would consider the fact that one of our allies in this war, an entire continent, has declared "enough is enough" to be front page news. However, I only learned about it from a 10 second piece on CNN. I wanted to learn more, so I went to Google News. There was no mention of it under the "World" section. I searched "Australia", and finally an article came up. It was listed third under a story on cricket and an energy company possibly being sold. Not only that, the Associated Press article was only 4 sentences, totalling 77 words. Wow.

For more on the Australian perspective, check out this article from the Sydney Morning Herald.

Energy Monopoly

2008-05-28T12:59:00.007-04:00

It's reassuring when big companies recognize the need to explore alternative energy sources. I recently found out that Parker Brothers / Hasboro has done just that. In August, they'll unveil "Monopoly Here & Now: World Edition". Instead of the "Electric Company" and "Water Works" utility spaces, they'll feature "Wind Energy" and "Solar Energy" in their place.

Even if you believe Global Warming is a farce, what's wrong with treating the environment better? Even if pollution isn't causing global climate change, wouldn't it be nice to power our world and do so in a way that would prevent grey skies and poor air conditions? Why be opposed to alternative sources of energy that have the potential to cost you, the consumer, less? Why be opposed to deleting our dependence on oil, the cause behind almost every international conflict and catalyst of war? Don't deny a good thing just because it might take some time and effort. The first step to solving a problem is acknowledging that there is one, and the people behind Monopoly have done just that.